Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Raging Hormones


 that turn perfectly sane women into crazy ladies once a month, otherwise known as PMS. Recently I was reading an article in Parents magazine that broke down the month into four weeks for a woman. I thought it was very tactful the way it suggested that you shouldn't address any issues bothering you during your third week as you might blow things out of proportion. Any woman in her "third" week will tell you to shut up, get out of the way and don't look at me funny this week. Husbands you should know to listen the first time and supply lots of chocolate. Do not attempt to finish a project of any kind. Do not invite people over for dinner when the house is not clean. And never never ever take anything that is said this week personally. It would be really helpful to if you would take care of the kids so your woman can take a bath or read a book. While this is happening never interrupt to ask questions and heaven forbid do you let any of the kids in the bathroom, that is if you want to live to see the next day.

Ok all kidding aside (haha if you think I am joking you must not have a woman in your life). Ladies how do you get through the raging, want to kick, scream, cry, and poke someone's eyes out hormones this time of the month? Let me know cause honey I am having trouble…..

Monday, March 15, 2010

Little Piddle

So as a nursing mother I have learned to do many things while the little one gets a meal. The most common thing is diaper changes in the middle of the night. Couple of nights ago I was nursing and changing the little girl, still in the old nursery (still haven't moved the couch and diapers in the new nursery). Things were going fine when I noticed that she had paused mid drink. It did not take long to figure out why she stopped as the warm wetness trickled down my leg. Ok more like gushed! Where did it all come from? Her diaper had been full before I started changing it. I started to clean up the mess, getting new jammies and making sure she didn't get the clean diaper too wet when I felt a new trickle start. Lordy and I worry about her being dehydrated sometimes. We were so wet I had to take off my shorts so that they didn't re-soak her clean clothes. In the future I will try to change her more quickly or maybe I will actually use one of those lappads that my mom bought me as a…..Lappad. Novel idea. Too bad at 3 am you really aren't thinking that much.

Friday, March 12, 2010

Jammies

So after night two in said jammies the conclusion is...they are just a little too(too) big.  At 2 am this morning I was woken by my little girls cries.  Thinking this was a normal come feed and change me cry, I stumbled my way into the nursery.  As I picked her up to comfort her I noticed something odd, in my sleep haze it took a moment to figure out, her right arm was completely out of the jammies. I am realizing now I did not describe the type of jammies she was wearing.  These are fully zipped with a snap at the top footie jammies. How the heck did she manage to get her arm out of them?  The world may never know.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Dad stuff

So I get home from swimming and Daddy has worked his magic and our girl is actually asleep (still is).  I do the usual routine, how long has she been asleep?  what did she eat? did she poo? And then we go about our normal vegging in-front of the computer screens.  About 20 minutes later he turns to me and says "Oh by the way just so you know.....the jammies I put her in are" I am like what radioactive, dirty, on fire??? "They are just a little too big but not so big I felt the need to change them."  LOL that pretty much sums up our parenting style. Gotta love him.

Number 5

  • Climbing in the hot tub after swimming and once again forgetting about the burn on my arm.

10 reasons you probably are a better parent than me.

  •  Number ten: I bet you don't have a burn the shape and nearly the size of pizza on your forearm.  This of course this was received while pulling actual pizza out of the oven.  I also bet you also didn't hop in the shower this morning forgetting about said burn and then remembering very quickly about it when the hot water hit it. So yeah I am a klutz.
  •  Number nine: So I get my diapers delivered monthly. Ah, you say, this is smart you don't have to worry about remembering to the store or running out in the middle of the night.  Yes both these things are true, as long as you don't mess with the system.  If you are me you mess with the system.  Seeing that we had "plenty" of diapers I decided to use the feature with my service to push back delivery a week.  This would have worked out fine except for two things; first my daughter decided to take on urinating as an Olympic sport and second the date I moved it to is the date it gets shipped out not the date that it arrives at the house.  I will never forget that UPS does not deliver on Sundays again.
  • Number eight: Pants I bet you have a least two pairs of pants and that one of them might be clean.  You are so far ahead of me on that one it is not even funny.  I have one pair of jeans.  That is right one pair, not one pair that fits or one pair I like.  So you ask what do I do when I need to wash the pair (after so many days of wearing them its embarrassing) I am forced to wear the dreaded sweat pants.  The sweat pants I told myself as a teenager I would never wear to town, to the store, or anywhere in public.  At this time I would like to say sorry to my own mother for judging her when I had no clue at all.  Love you, Mom!
  •  Number four:  So I am sure you have had a few laughs and are enjoying picturing me around town with my saggy sweat bottoms. Now I have to reveal to you that I am not just scatterbrained but also crazy.  I will admit it I got caught up in the cute and I did not think this one through very much at all.  And my family and friends in their wisdom respected this crazy postpartum idea.  Two weeks before my daughter started crawling I got a puppy. No not a young dog, a puppy.  One that needed potty trained, crate trained, chew trained, no biting the baby trained.  Let's just say it took about 2 months before I threw the towel in on this adventure.  As one well spoken sister told me her thoughts later, " A baby and a puppy what is she thinking?".
  •  Number three:  I am guessing that you guys weren't up at 3am writing down a list of  top top tens while your kid was asleep and you should have been too.
  • Number two:  You are probably smart enough not to start rearranging the baby room and office the night of your husband's birthday party.  Not only did we start it but we were nowhere close to finishing when it was time for bed.  The crib was ready but everything else was not so lacking the foresight I was scrambling around trying to find a diaper (it was in the old nursery) and a place to change said diaper (also in the old nursery) without the help of the handy dandy nightlight (it was in the new nursery) all of this happening at 2:30 in the morning. Yay me! Tune in for more posts on my obsession for rearranging the house.
  • The number one reason you are a better parent than me.... you are reading this blog and therefore can learn from my many mistakes.
So those of you who noticed that there really are only seven reasons good for you another thing you are better at then me, counting.  Thanks!